Minimalization and my Craigslist Friends

I've made a real push to reduce the amount of stuff I have.  I really have just gotten to the point where I feel like I have too much clutter, and it's making me a bit uneasy.  Every time I've gotten ridden of something, it's very therapeautic.

So, with that in mind; I started posting all of my things on Craigslist.  What I didn't anticipate (although I should've) was the amount of , ahem...interesting people that I've met while unloading all of these items.  I wanted to tell you about all my new craigslist friends, before I forgot about them.  Starting with:


Sue decided to buy my jackalope.  I posted it for $40 and Kari never thought it would sell.  About a week later I get an email from Sue saying "I've been looking for one of these!" I met her in a Spires parking lot in Long Beach and she gave me the money, grabbed the jackalope (it was for a friend of hers) and peeled out in her minivan.  But she wasn't nearly as quick as

rivertrash@yahoo.com, who wanted to buy one of my Muhammad Ali posters for $5.  He emailed me about 5 time asking for details. What's the size? What is the frame made out of? Is it in good condition?  Sheesh rivertrash, it's $5.  If you come over and ask if you can have it for free, I'd give it to you.  But he came over, said "hi" slapped the 5 bucks in my hand, grabbed the poster and left.  I was laughing as I shut the door.  I never really knew his real name.  I did get to know

Ernie & Jene, as they were interested in the aquarium.  If fact, their emailed response to my add said "we are Ernie & Jene, we are husband and wife who would like to buy your fish tank."  They came over on a Friday night to take a look at it, and 45 minutes later we were still bullshitting about what kind of fish they have, and their respective jobs as nurses.  Then, they gave me a $40 deposit so they could come back and pick it up later.  Ernie came back on Monday with Jason, his neighbor/friend who asked me if I was a bodybuilder for a living.  Whaaa?  If, by bodybuilding; you mean I fill my gut up with beer every few days, then yeah...I'm a bodybuilder.  But they ended up taking the tank, and drove to my house to get it.  Unlike

Jamie Lou, who was interested in buying the corkboards I put on sale for $10 for three of them.  She wanted them, and then conned me into believing that she wasn't sure about how to get around in L.A.  So I met her at a Winchell's parking lot in Hollywood.  She gave me 9 $1 bills, and the last dollar in nickels and dimes.  Thanks a lot Jamie!

(Side note: I've got a tip about selling things on craigslist.  If you want to sell it, then agree to meet someone somewhere, preferablly closer to their house than yours.  That way, they have a sense of guilt, and they feel that since you've come all that way, then they just have to buy it.)  Case in point...

Orpha, who wanted Kelly's ottoman and pillow, we talked and she was supposed to pick it up the next day.  She seemed to flake, and didn't call me back for a couple of days. When I called her, she confessed that she got her wisdom tooth removed, and didn't want me to see her with a fat face.  I assured her this wouldn't be an issue, and even offered to meet her at a Starbucks, near her home in Hawthorne.  Up pulls Orpha, wearing a medical mask over her face so I can't see her swollen wisdom face.  She was so happy that I did  meet her that she gave me $25, even though we only asked for $15!  She said it was because "I seemed like such a nice man."  I'll show her, trying to flake on me.  Although I did get flaked on by

Alton, who agreed to buy my nunchuk's that I had posted for $10.  Then he didn't call to come pick them up when he said he was going to.  Oh sure, he phoned me later that he was at church and "couldn't break away"...is that supposed to make it right?  I agreed to hold nunchuks for you.  Which didn't put me out nearly as much as

Tormo, who came to look at my mountain bike.  Tormo had a good french (or was it spanish) accent, and 3 cigars sticking out of his army jacket breast pocket when he looked at the bike.  He road it around and said "this looks good.  I will buy your bike.  However, I have a slight problem"  You see, Tormo drove over in a convertible 2-seater with virtually no trunk.  "I don't know how I am going to get your bike home."  Tormo looked at me, and I shrugged my shoulders.  "Meeetchell, can you drive this bike to my house?  Why don't I pay you extra to do."  Clearly, I have a problem saying no, because I agreed.  I put the bike in my car for an extra $10 and drove it up to a bike shop in Venice for him.  It only took me 45 minutes round trip.  Ridiculous.

I still have several other things I'd like to sell, so stay tuned.  The money is nice, but these characters I'm meeting along the way are even better.

Final note: NONE of these names have been changed to protect the innocent.